You may also want to direct him to a site like Scarleteen which is written especially for teenagers with sex ed in mind (thanks, reader Lauren, for calling this one out to me! It's too important and misunderstood to not be reinforcing constantly.It sounds like you've actually been doing everything right!I'm SO disappointed as I thought I was doing a good job teaching him about enthusiastic consent, legal issues with minors, and framing media news in a teachable way. Do any of you have any advice or resources for dealing with this?" – D As with most situations like this, the onus usually gets put on the victim to stop doing something: succumbing to pressure, acting a certain way, complying to demands — but there's been a shift in thinking, especially after a bright light has been placed on men in positions of power in the media.I'm glad to hear that you're using it for teachable moments and worrying about how to affect your son's behavior as opposed to wondering how to stop the girl on the other end of the phone.While she also needs to learn how to react when pressured to send illicit photos, the onus far often needs to be on the boys' side to stop the behavior.As the NYT article posits, this won't change things overnight, but it will start to change the norms of behavior and start to restructure the rules of what is and isn't acceptable or crossing a line.It truly does sound like you've been doing all the right things to teach your son about consent and boundaries, but teens often need even more reinforcement through personal experiences or thoughtful conversations.
Finding personal stories of the legal and emotional consequences can be helpful to share.' ' Now screams loud, but later lasts longer.Don't let the digital now ruin your later dreams.' These are phrases we use with kids.Discuss consent, what is a healthy outlet for sexual desire, be open with him.Then ask what he thinks would be an appropriate way to make it right with his friend." – Kristin "Ask him why he thought it was ok…Kids and teens make mistakes, it's important to use this opportunity to teach him, rather than just punish him. Edited to add, I also second a heartfelt hand written apology to this girl! Sexuality and desire is not anything to be ashamed of.